Both Sides

I walk the halls, wanting the sadness
Willing my despondence to linger
My fingers trace the painted drywall
And stop, of all things, on the mirror
My eyes refocus on this hollow shell of a woman
I am disheveled, I am alone.
What is it about this life that makes you decide?
Mere ambiguity has no place, only time
The face in the mirror is indeed mine
But the voice she uses, a mask
And her lone task is to make it through one more day
Without her mask slipping, giving herself away
She can trace the creases that the mask has made
Battle scars from the wounds she'll never let fade
Because to do so would require exposure
And she's already spent years as an unwilling soldier
Her mother told her don't let nothing or nobody make
you get older
Cause it's soon enough that your ashes get colder
So why do I let the mask put lines on my face?
To perpetuate the lie that life is nothing but great?
What a sad state of affairs
Closed doors, no one's there
Locked up, no one's aware
Now my spirit has fallen into disrepair
Too scared to admit the truth to anyone
They say we're living in a new millenium
So what am I running from?
I'm fleeing from the goddamn mirror
Afraid what I'll see if it looked a bit clearer.