Materialistic

In our living room, 2007:
Two rats in an aquarium
A beta fish in a different aquarium,
a television set next to a rack of videos and DVDs
my UNI Bachelor of Arts degree
$210 on a coffee table that's really an end table
three blankets from Mexico, 2 from our parents' houses
popcorn on the carpet
photos of family and friends on shelves on the wall
a stack of magazines I've yet to read
a library book I've yet to return
Cubs hats, candles and kleenex
incense, check stubs and an unfinished puzzle of Mt. Rushmore
a square of knitted red yarn, linked to yards of rolled-up
red yarn awaiting to be knitted
a mural of a house by a lake in the mountains we could
never hope to afford
the linen closet door cracked open
my coin collection in a jar
two scarves advertising soccer teams
containers filled with item to be recycled
and a wind chime.
Though, the wind hasn't blown through here for many,
many years. It will again someday.

Slam 3

I have often wondered if the errors of my youth
Transformed the possibilities of who I've become
Or if the fallacies of my past merely allowed me to
succumb to my present failures easier.
These excuses make me more reclusive
Now I'm clueless as to what the bluest skies reveal
Just like his blue eyes conceal a smile borne of bemusement
I pursue fulfillment without amusement
Hoping it will all eventually come to fruition
But he knows it takes more than ammunition to
get a weapon to fire.
I say "I'm tired." Pretend the consequences are dire.
But he understands into the oblivion of my memories is
the place I want to retire.
And those blue eyes smile and allow me
To retreat into the depths of this existential philosophy
God love that man because he loves me enough
To let go when I ask instead of pretend to be tough.